Unpacking Solo Travel: Bis from Bis to the World
Today I am happy to share another Unpacking Solo Travel interview, this time with Bis, a fellow solo traveler based out of Manchester, England and creator of Bis to the World. Bis has collaborated with us before on what it’s like to solo travel, and this time we sat down to talk about her experiences, including tips for other women who want to travel by themselves.
Bis, I’m so glad to talk to you! I’ve been following you for a while, and I really enjoy what you’ve been posting. So, you’re a travel blogger, but also an engineer. Could you tell us a little bit about yourself?
I'm a full-time engineer, working in the railway industry, and on the side I travel. Travel started for me about five years ago, and I started blogging about two and a half years ago. I just wanted a change, and I thought, “I like traveling. I like to show my travels, so I might as well start a blog.” And I did!
My blog is focused on working travelers, people that have a nine-to-five job or business and still want to travel. Even though you've got a full-time job or a full-time business, you can still travel if you plan and save wisely. You can see the world, too.
And you focus on luxury travel, is that right?
I call it “affordable luxury” -- luxury, but on a budget. Having a nice experience without spending thousands of pounds or dollars. That’s my niche. I like to live well with a little bit of money.
So, what led you to solo travel?
I think it was about two years ago now that I saw super cheap tickets to Thessaloniki, Greece, and I thought, “Oh, beautiful, let's do it.” I called my friend that I usually call for travel, and we were both ready to go..
But when it was time to book the accommodation, she was no longer able to go on the trip. I was so bummed; I really wanted to take advantage of the deal. I thought, “You know what? It’s such a good deal, and I’ve already got the time off. It’s just three days. I’m just going to do it.” And I went.
I was so nervous, but I found a great place to stay. It was so cheap, and everything lined up perfectly. I had no excuse, so I just went. And that was it.
I love how often solo trips happen by accident. My first solo trip was by accident too. I was supposed to go with friends, and they all dropped out. I had to ask myself if I was enough of a reason to take the trip, if treating myself was enough of a reason to do this thing.
I love that.
So, you booked this three-day trip, and then what happens? How did you decide what to do with your time? What emotional hurdles did you have?
I had everything booked: the flight, the Airbnb, I was tied to it, so I had no excuse. It was, “I'm going; there’s no way out; there’s no refund; it's done. I’m going to do this, and it’s for three days.”
So, I started planning my three days. I'm a big planner. I love to plan my trips, and I did that to the extreme for this one. I had a full itinerary - every single step of my day was planned. I took the planning to a whole new level and figured I would rather have too many things to do than not know what to do and appear uncomfortable.
I even mapped out on Google Maps everything I wanted to see, everywhere I wanted to eat, everywhere I wanted to take pictures. It was planning on steroids.
But that really helped me feel more comfortable about the trip because I just thought, I know what I'm doing. I knew how to get from the airport to my Airbnb. I knew how to get into the city. I knew everything pretty much before I went, and that made me feel so much more comfortable about what I was going to do, being there by myself.
Emotionally though, I was just nervous at first, even just on the plane. But I went, and when I landed, I took the bus to the Airbnb. Everything was fine. And then my host was the most amazing person. She was so nice. She helped me out so much, gave me tips on where to go, what to do, where to eat. It turned out that she and I attended the same university at the same time! It was the most random connection. It was just a good start to the trip.
But I think the planning was the best thing that I did for myself.
I like what you said about being nervous just to fly, but still going, and then you get there and think, “Okay, this is really happening now.” You just take it one step at a time. It’s okay that the idea of traveling alone is overwhelming. But you’ve planned, you’ve done the research, you’ve equipped yourself with what you know.
And that doesn't mean you're not going to be thrown off occasionally. But you have a foundation laid out that will give you the confidence to keep going when that plan gets interrupted, and you’re no longer overwhelmed with everything.
That is literally how I live. Even when I'm overwhelmed in normal life and at work. I make lists, and plans, and can break anything down into tiny steps.
You mentioned that you were emotional on the plane. Was that just nerves or was it about something else?
I think I was probably just nervous of not knowing if I could enjoy a new country or experiences by myself. Would I still have the same level of fun, and the same interaction with this country and have the same memories, without someone to experience that with me?
For me, is travel about the people, about a place, or about me? And that trip made me know that it's about me.
So how would you answer if someone asked, “Can I enjoy an experience on my own?
1000% you can. You can enjoy it because it’s just you. Travel is just one of those things where you don’t need other people to make your experience. The people you will meet can make your experience more memorable, but you and yourself make the experience that you want to have.
I met a woman on a group tour when I was in Greece, and she just didn't want to interact with the group. We had all planned to hang out after the group, and I invited her, but she just wasn’t interested. She just went back to her hostel after the tour, and that was it for her. She wanted to do that, and that's what made her experience hers.
Solo travel allows you to tailor your experience to yourself. You can decide what you want to do when you want to do it, how you want to enjoy your trip, how you want to experience the city without anybody else's opinions coming into your decision-making process. I think that makes it more enjoyable for you as well because you can do what you want and nobody cares.
It really is this beautiful thing where you can connect with other people, but you can also walk away and just leave to go back to your room and read a book.
You can do that, 100%. I wanted the woman I met on the group tour to come get food with us, and she just said, “No thanks”.
What’s really inspiring about people like that is their confidence. I love it. There is no codependency. There's no worry about hurting feelings or making anyone feel rejected. They just do what they want. I love that.
On that topic of meeting people, what are ways that you can make friends while traveling alone?
On my trip to Greece, I booked that group tour for my very first day. I met three or four people there who were also solo travelers, which is perfect because we just sort of clicked. We all hung out. That was my way of meeting people. I’ve been on a few solo trips since, and for almost everyone, I make friends on group tours.
My last solo trip was to Bordeaux. I actually missed my group tour because I had slept in, so I had to find a different way to make friends.
There’s this whole thing about taking photos when you’re solo traveling. You don’t always want selfies, so sometimes you must ask strangers. I’m in this square in Bordeaux, thinking, “I must get a picture here, I’m going to stay here for as long as it takes to find someone to take a picture of me.”
I sat on a bench for about 10 or 15 minutes just looking for someone to ask. And then I spotted this girl. I thought, “Oh, I like her outfit. She looks young, and she’s by herself, the perfect candidate, I’m going to talk to her.” I said, “Hi, I’m alone, would you mind taking a picture of me, and I can take a picture of you as well.” And she said, “Oh, perfect, yes.” We took our pictures and started talking, and we ended up hanging out afterwards. I made a new friend just by asking her to take a picture of me. And then she introduced me to other friends she had made, and we all got to enjoy our trip together.
I think we shouldn't put too much pressure on meeting people. You can make friends just by walking down a street or sitting in a square.
I'm glad you brought that up. I was going to ask you how you are getting these gorgeous photos! There are a lot of people who like to do the whole crazy tripod setup thing, and they'll spend all day doing that. I would love to have beautiful photos on my trips, but I'm also not going to spend that much time getting them, so I'm curious what you do to get yours.
A lot of times I literally just go on Instagram and find local photographers. I’ll message them and let them know that I’ll be in their city and ask if they want to collaborate, and I’m even willing to pay a little bit if I need to. But most of the time I’ll meet up with these photographers, and they’ll end up showing me unique spots or a great place to eat, and it’s just another good way of making friends. You can also do Airbnb Experiences, where you can walk around with someone who will take your picture for two or three hours.
Sometimes, like in Bordeaux, I’ll just ask a stranger to take my picture, but you really have to pick the right stranger, and you have to find the right person. I tend to ask younger people, especially if they’re by themselves. Also, people who are walking around with DSLRs usually know what they’re doing. That’s who I look for.
That's a great tip.
Okay, so, you went to Greece on that first solo trip. Where else have you been?
I did Greece. I went to the Netherlands last year. While I was there, I went to this obscure city, Groningen, that has cool ancient Roman ruins. I went to Rotterdam last year.
What were some of your most memorable experiences?
In Greece, I literally couldn’t have written a better first trip. Honestly, everything just fell into place so perfectly.
When I was there, I went to this beach about 30 minutes by ferry from the city. I was sitting on this bench at the beach, when this older Greek guy walked past and just said, “Oh hello. You’re Nigerian, aren’t you?” I was like, “Wow, what do you mean? How did you know that I’m Nigerian?” He said that he could just tell. Then he started speaking to me in my native language, and we had a whole conversation. He apparently used to live in my home country of Nigeria in the 60s and 70s and married a Nigerian woman.
It was the weirdest coincidence, I think, I've ever experienced in my life, but it was the best experience I’ve had while solo traveling because it was so unexpected, and it made me feel so happy all day. I met somebody while I was just sitting on this bench, packing my bags, with sand on my feet. To this day it still makes me smile whenever I think about it.
That’s such a beautiful story because we so often think about the fear of strangers and other safety issues when you're traveling by yourself, especially when it's a random man approaching you when you’re alone. But that doesn't mean that everyone's a creep. I love when we get these beautiful moments of humanity with a stranger, and there's this real connection. It just kind of brings us back to the purity of humanity.
I love that. You do have to be careful when speaking to strangers, but I think sometimes you can take calculated risks. I was in an open place, people could see me, everyone could see him. I wasn't in some secluded corner in some alleyway.
I didn't feel unsafe speaking to him. He approached me in a very normal, casual, friendly manner. The only thing I could do is to respond in a friendly manner, too. I could easily have been like, “I'm sorry I don't know you,” But I didn’t, and now I have that amazing experience.
Be open but be open with sense.
Do you have any other safety strategies or tips that you would like to add?
It’s a weird question for me because I feel like on my solo trips that I tend to do things I probably wouldn't normally do, which could sometimes be a bad thing. Sometimes I look back and think, “Why the hell did I just do that? That’s not something I would have done if I were with other people!
But I think it’s all about having common sense. Don’t miss out on going out at night just because it sounds dangerous. But maybe don’t walk around at night by yourself. Tell people where you are going. Keep in touch with people at home. Hide your valuables. Don’t flash your big new iPhone or Rolex. Always have insurance.
There are some good apps I’ve heard about as well. There’s one called bSafe, which tells your people at home where you are and if there’s an emergency. If you feel uncomfortable, you can have it call your phone to give you an excuse to get out of that situation. It keeps track of where you’ve been. It’s just a good way of knowing that you’re covered.
Also, don’t live-share your location. Post the pictures when you’re back at your hotel. Share your food pictures after you’ve left the restaurant. You don’t need everyone to know where you are.
Those are really good tips, thank you.
Earlier you were talking about how on that first trip, you prepped by over-planning. On your blog, you’ve talked about making sure you have down time. Can you explain what you mean by that?
So, on the Greece trip, I had a full three-day packed itinerary from morning to evening. I knew what I was going to do pretty much every hour of every day. I had it all planned and mapped out. The first two days, I really stuck to my plan exactly, but on the third day, I thought, I really don’t want to do that today. I don’t feel like following the plan. I just want to go to the beach. So, I got dressed and went to the beach, and that’s when I met the guy who spoke my native language.
I think it's a good thing to have a plan, but don't let it restrict you. It's just supposed to guide you, not hold you back from experiences
Having downtime is so important for solo trips because you’ve spent so much time and energy being nervous, and your emotions are spent because you’re feeling all these things at the same time. You’re scared, you’re happy, you’re sad, you’re lonely, etc. So, a few days of a solo trip is exhausting. Take some time, sit back, and recuperate before going back to normal life.
Find some space just to relax because that's the point of travel. I find that sometimes I go on trips, and I come back more tired than when I went. I don’t feel refreshed for some reason. I think we need to find that happy balance of experience and relaxation. Honestly, your life will feel so much better for doing it.
You must be intentional about rest because, otherwise, it just doesn't happen. It's a very emotional experience. Solo travel is invigorating, and it is empowering. But it's also very emotional. And I think that's not something we talk about enough, so when people finally do get the courage to travel on their own, they're shocked when they hit those emotions because no one prepared them for that. Nobody told them that they’re going to feel lonely at times, or overwhelmed, so when those moments do come, they don’t know what to do with them.
And I think what you said about changing the plan is important. If you’re feeling like your plan isn't serving you, change the plan. The plan is not in charge of you; you don’t have to see every monument or do every activity. They’ll be there when you come back.
Don’t even try to see everything. It’s okay not to have the same experience as someone else. Two people can go to the same country and come back with two completely different stories. You need to be open to not doing everything that there is to do.
Don't feel the need to pack your itinerary so full and don't feel the need to do everything when you don't have to. Because you don't have to. Be nice to yourself.
Yes. Be nice to yourself. What beautiful advice.
Is there anything else that you would add for other women who are considering solo travel?
Don't overthink it. If you have it in your heart that you want to try it, just take a small step. Maybe you might not be ready to go to France alone, or go to Brazil alone, but you can take a walk down to the cinema alone. You can go get dinner alone, or you can go shopping alone. Do something by yourself just to get yourself mentally ready for what it might feel like to go to a new place on your own.
And, yes, be nice to yourself. Treat yourself to solo travel. It’s one of the most exciting, emotional, experiences that you will do and once you do it, you’ll think, “Why the hell haven't I been doing this all along?”
It's amazing. You can do what you want. You don’t have to think about anybody else. When do you ever get to not think about anybody else in life? You're always considering somebody else's feelings, somebody else's opinions. But with solo travel, you have one person to consider and that's you.
Yes, I love that. Thank you so much. I hope you’ve enjoyed this conversation with Bis. If you want to keep up with her, you can follow her on her very interactive social media platforms at @BistotheWorld, and on her website, Bis to the World. For more tips on traveling solo, check out our Solo Travel Guide.
Do you have questions about what it’s like to travel alone for the first time?
Let us know in the comments below!
